“Sometimes what you’re most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.”- Robert Tew
Ever notice how being turned down stops some people from trying again, while others bounce back from rejection stronger than before? Everyone experiences the sting of rejection, but mentally strong people use that pain to grow stronger and become better.
Whether you were excluded from a social engagement, or you were passed up for a promotion, rejection hurts. The way you choose to respond to rejection, however, could determine the entire course of your future.
There's probably no worse feeling in life than the feeling of being rejected. Whether it’s from the opposite sex, a friend or family member, or co-workers, the feeling that our presence is not wanted or no longer welcomed can cause us to feel pain and become defensive.
Things will definitely not always go your way and there are countless instances when you’ll just feel down because of all the cancelled contracts and failed negotiations. But hey, let’s not focus on the negatives here!
People sometimes reject us because of the behavior we exhibit in our interactions with them. When people feel uncomfortable, they're instinctively going to want to prevent themselves from experiencing annoyance or irritation. And their obvious solution is to remove themselves from our presence.
The result is that we end up feeling rejected by it.
But that's why rejection isn't personal. In this case, they’re not rejecting us; they’re rejecting our behavior.
Of course, you have the right to argue that even the behavior they are rejecting is ours. But think again
Are you sure? Most of our behaviors dont belong to us. They are either conditioned or learned through observing other people react to different situations!
Weird, right?
But we have a simple 3 step solution to this problem.
Mentally strong individuals are said to ope better with rejection...lets see how do they do it
(source: inc)
1 They Acknowledge Their Emotions
Rather than suppress, ignore, or deny the pain, mentally strong people acknowledge their emotions. They admit when they're embarrassed, sad, disappointed, or discouraged. They have confidence in their ability to deal with uncomfortable emotions head-on, which is essential to coping with their discomfort in a healthy manner.
2 They Refuse to Let Rejection Define Them
Mentally strong people don't make sweeping generalizations when they're rejected. If one company turns them down for a job, they don't declare themselves incompetent. Or, if they get rejected by a single love interest, they don't conclude they're unlovable. They keep rejection in proper perspective.
One person's opinion, or one single incident, should never define who you are. Don't let your self-worth depend upon other people's opinions of you. Just because someone else thinks something about you, doesn't mean it's true.
3 They Learn From Rejection
Mentally strong people ask themselves, "What did I gain from this?" so they can learn from rejection. Rather than simply tolerate the pain, they turn it into an opportunity for self-growth. With each rejection, they grow stronger and become better.
Whether you learn about areas in your life that need improvement, or you simply recognize that being turned down isn't awful as you imagined, rejection can be a good teacher. Use rejection as an opportunity to move forward with more wisdom.
It’s not always easy to recognize if there’s something to learn from rejection, or if the rejection is merely a consequence of someone else’s unmet expectations. But the distinction becomes much clearer when we develop self-awareness about our behaviors and how they affect others.
so next time you are rejected, walk out like a BOSS! :)
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